I find these similar to
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LSD taught me a lot, but I took it and remained an Atheist for some time. Mushrooms, as someone previously uninterested in drugs of any class, were shocking in their ability to enact revelatory states of mind, like deep therapuetic relief and something similar to what I imagined 'religious awe' to be like. I am hesitant to make strong claims based on my personal mushroom trips, because they appear so earth-shatteringly real to the point where a period of time afterward is spent integrating the whole ordeal into a greater framework, so that insanity or delusions of grandeur do not take over completely. This seems to be a key trait in the tryptamine compounds. The past was an angry ghost over my shoulder every day. Every mistake, betrayal gnawing away at my brain. Each part of life became scarier over time. God was absent. Couldn't exist. Look around. It's all awful. Everyone is dying, broke. Where is God in any of it? I had these thoughts often and typically they came with cognitive associations of my childhood trauma and other repressed things. I spoke from my pain constantly and if God existed he wanted me to suffer and enjoyed it, relished in it even. Eating mushrooms alone didn't change my mind. I took them a few times in the lower doses, and had several enlightening experiences that seemed to intertwine the nature of space and mind seamlessly and create quasi-telepathic synchronicities. At a certain point I began wondering if there was more to the whole thing, more to life itself. I was wrong about psychedelic drugs in most ways; I had an incomplete picture of reality. Maybe I was wrong to assume God wasn't around just because I couldn't see it with my eyes. And one day I had an experience that changed my mind. This isn't the place to tell that story, but a large enough dose and a proper intention set, which I wrote down in a notebook prior to eating seven dried grams of mushrooms as 'spiritual council with myself'. cont cont cont cont here